Spring Break
Sexual Anarchy in the UK: American girl style
Our former sex columnist learns the differences between British modesty and American openness when talking about sex
Issue date: 10/25/07
I finally had my first English Facebook friend, and I considered myself to be a true British student. A week later I saw him again at the student bar. He approached me cautiously and said, "So I was stalking you on Facebook. There is quite a lot of sex in your profile."
Proudly, I laughed and said, "I was the sex columnist at my home university."
"Oh ... I see, " was his curt reply. The conversation deadpanned from there.
As an American college student, I'm used to seeing, hearing or talking about some form of sex. Whether it's the latest gossip of a threesome or two guys pretending to Eiffel Tower a girl as she picks up her beer pong ball, sex is constantly in our faces in college. However in my British "uni" sex isn't a major part of everyday life in my experience so far.
The closest I've come to breaching the topic with British students was listing pick-up lines, a fairly tame discussion. Two seemingly innocent freshmen boys were overjoyed at their purchase of a poster listing the top "chat-up lines." "Oy! Read that one, 'Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?' Haha!" The most inoffensive, harmless lines had them practically spitting out their beer in laughter. It was quite a different scene from watching American guys go off about attempting to double-team the newest piece of freshman slut.
Joking about sexual intimacy can also be somewhat dangerous. I managed to embarrass another little first year boy by suggesting that we spoon. The laughter quickly ceased and he stared at me awkwardly. I came to find out that in England spooning is not the innocent act of cuddling but implies actual sex. My orientation leaders warned us about these situations, citing an example when a Brit challenged an American girl to embarrass him. Without hesitation she asked him when the last time he masturbated was. From then on, she was known as THAT ballsy American devoid of shame.
It isn't my intention to label the English as prudes, especially college students. Like us they're still teenagers with hormones surging through their bodies, guiding them to bad decisions once mixed with one too many pints. The difference is that sexuality isn't something to be flaunted here.
Proudly, I laughed and said, "I was the sex columnist at my home university."
"Oh ... I see, " was his curt reply. The conversation deadpanned from there.
As an American college student, I'm used to seeing, hearing or talking about some form of sex. Whether it's the latest gossip of a threesome or two guys pretending to Eiffel Tower a girl as she picks up her beer pong ball, sex is constantly in our faces in college. However in my British "uni" sex isn't a major part of everyday life in my experience so far.
The closest I've come to breaching the topic with British students was listing pick-up lines, a fairly tame discussion. Two seemingly innocent freshmen boys were overjoyed at their purchase of a poster listing the top "chat-up lines." "Oy! Read that one, 'Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?' Haha!" The most inoffensive, harmless lines had them practically spitting out their beer in laughter. It was quite a different scene from watching American guys go off about attempting to double-team the newest piece of freshman slut.
Joking about sexual intimacy can also be somewhat dangerous. I managed to embarrass another little first year boy by suggesting that we spoon. The laughter quickly ceased and he stared at me awkwardly. I came to find out that in England spooning is not the innocent act of cuddling but implies actual sex. My orientation leaders warned us about these situations, citing an example when a Brit challenged an American girl to embarrass him. Without hesitation she asked him when the last time he masturbated was. From then on, she was known as THAT ballsy American devoid of shame.
It isn't my intention to label the English as prudes, especially college students. Like us they're still teenagers with hormones surging through their bodies, guiding them to bad decisions once mixed with one too many pints. The difference is that sexuality isn't something to be flaunted here.
Viewing Comments 1 - 5 of 5
Ash
posted 5/20/08 @ 10:20 PM EST
What upper class university are you going to ?
Derby uni is nothing like this.
Tara
posted 5/21/08 @ 1:12 AM EST
Well, they're okay with nudity because it's so desexualized, aren't they? That makes sense to me, anyways. America is so sexual that we have difficulty seeing nudity as anything but. (Continued…)
Alasdair
posted 5/28/08 @ 7:32 AM EST
I suspect the lack of grinding has something to do with the fact that we realised R&B was wank a few years ago and re-discovered guitars...
Something that hadn't happened for the American exchange students I know. (Continued…)
nimal
posted 3/17/09 @ 1:30 PM EST
sex
Brad
posted 6/08/09 @ 8:55 AM EST
what doughnut is writing this article?? can we see a pic of her, because I am guessing that might be the reason behind her not getting laid while over here. (Continued…)
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