Italy: finding amore when all you want is friendship
Letters from Abroad
Sometimes I feel like the longer I stay here in Rome, the more unlikely the prospect of assimilating into Italian culture becomes.
The stereotypes surrounding American behavior seem to follow me wherever I go. They taunt any effort I make to constructively appreciate the urbanities of Italian mannerisms. And there is no way to be discrete or subtle about where I am from because it appears that everything about me gives it away.
Some people in my program have completely given up the hope that someone might confuse them for an Italian; others insist on ignoring or remaining utterly ignorant of the cultural differences, satisfying themselves with the comfort zone that has become their American group of friends.
I suppose I fall somewhere in the middle of these two rather bleak possibilities. I want to refuse to give up on trying to understand the Italian way of life, but the more I understand the more confused and befuddled I become. I sometimes find myself craving the unrefined normalcy of my college campus, and then I have to push myself to fight the inclination to want to be comfortable again.
Though this cultural adventure is often intellectually satisfying, it is personally arduous and often frustrating. When the complacency of my American peers is not enough and when the desire to explore and experience these differences is especially compelling, I am driven to find outlets to fulfill this sensation, but this search often ends unsuccessfully. The ultimate outlet for this anxious search would no doubt be the acquiring of Italian friends.
Because I am in Rome for the year, it is definitely necessary to try to establish a life of some sort here. And when do you feel more comfortable and more stable than when you are with your friends. Making Italian friends would perhaps work to explain many of the cultural habits I find to be mystifying and bewildering.
The interactions between men and women would hopefully become more transparent, and with this understanding I would feel less like an outside observer and more like a one of the "cool kids," like an Italian.
The stereotypes surrounding American behavior seem to follow me wherever I go. They taunt any effort I make to constructively appreciate the urbanities of Italian mannerisms. And there is no way to be discrete or subtle about where I am from because it appears that everything about me gives it away.
Some people in my program have completely given up the hope that someone might confuse them for an Italian; others insist on ignoring or remaining utterly ignorant of the cultural differences, satisfying themselves with the comfort zone that has become their American group of friends.
I suppose I fall somewhere in the middle of these two rather bleak possibilities. I want to refuse to give up on trying to understand the Italian way of life, but the more I understand the more confused and befuddled I become. I sometimes find myself craving the unrefined normalcy of my college campus, and then I have to push myself to fight the inclination to want to be comfortable again.
Though this cultural adventure is often intellectually satisfying, it is personally arduous and often frustrating. When the complacency of my American peers is not enough and when the desire to explore and experience these differences is especially compelling, I am driven to find outlets to fulfill this sensation, but this search often ends unsuccessfully. The ultimate outlet for this anxious search would no doubt be the acquiring of Italian friends.
Because I am in Rome for the year, it is definitely necessary to try to establish a life of some sort here. And when do you feel more comfortable and more stable than when you are with your friends. Making Italian friends would perhaps work to explain many of the cultural habits I find to be mystifying and bewildering.
The interactions between men and women would hopefully become more transparent, and with this understanding I would feel less like an outside observer and more like a one of the "cool kids," like an Italian.
Viewing Comments 1 - 4 of 4
Shaheen
posted 11/29/07 @ 4:46 AM EST
Hi,
I want to friend in Italy & I want to job there.
Now I job in Bangladesh. I am an executive in charge a private company.
I will believe that I have a capacity for hard & sincerely work & best friendship. (Continued…)
Md. Monirul Islam
posted 1/17/08 @ 2:40 AM EST
Hi I am monir. I Need a best friend in italy. I want to job in italy.
Now I live in Bangladesh. I service in a computer show rooms.
Please E-mail - ME. (Continued…)
C.S.
posted 1/18/08 @ 12:07 AM EST
Hahaha...I don't think this article was at ALL intended to FIND friends like some sort of ad...it was just a comment on how hard it is to find friends. (Continued…)
Noman
posted 10/05/08 @ 2:21 PM EST
আসলে C.S এর কথাই ঠিক
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